Hard on Myself

My friends will tell you I am extremely hard on myself. This has been a life long deal for me. This brings me to tonight. Tonight was a tempo run - 3 X 1600m. I was just ok the first mile 5.6 MPH. After a walk and jog break, Scott had my crank up to 5.8 MPH. This is what killed me.

I felt my legs giving out a couple times (Note: due to bad weather we were inside on treadmills). I took a couple of breaks. Scott told me to scale back a bit. I did, but I was mad at myself for doing it. If I continued I would slipped off the treadmill.

I just felt like lead tonight, no matter what I did. My mind was also being a mess. In the shower I felt like I had failed. I hung my head and felt low. I met up with Scott and talked about it. He did not seem concerned. He told me it is much better to get the bad sessions out of the way early. He told me I am very much on pace for my sub 6 hour marathon. So this made me feel a bit better.

On the train ride home I thought some more about it. I know my running has improved, and I have to be patient and cut me some slack. I am a much better runner than I was 3 years ago. I am a stronger person, and there is still 3 months until the marathon.

When I am in a down mood, I tend to forget the strengths I have. Emails from friends lately have pointed out to me how strong I am. I am reminded of things I have overcome. Most importantly I reminded myself on the train that I am the guy who finished the marathon in Arizona with blisters and pain...and I DID IT! I CAN DO IT AGAIN!

So this workout is behind me...time to get it in gear!

:-)Charlie