Deja Vu?

The forecast for this year's Chicago Marathon is a low of 62, and a high of 75. Runners are trembling that this is last year all over again. It isn't really, but I can understand that thought. Marathon officials have devised a weather warning system, much like the color coded terror alert system in the U.S. They have also added aid stations, and will offer wet sponges to runners.

Still nervous customers are talking to me about their concerns.

This year won't be like last year. Oh it will be a warm one, it just won't be a HOT one.

I will be out there cheering though. Can't wait to see the runners go by.

Charlie

Looking to 2009!

Today I met with my regular doctor who was as happy as I was about the no cancer result. So now we got down to business. He was extremely pleased with my progress from physical therapy. He could tell I had gotten stronger in my legs, but now I need to work on my core.

To that end, he gave me the green light for a mid to late 2009 marathon. Instead of the usual 16 week training though, he wants me to develop a 32 week training program. His thought is that with my arthritis, I need to prepare more for a marathon. So I am going to research from possible plans, if there aren't any, I suppose I develop one on my own. The plan has to be heavy on cross training so my body is strong, and the pounding on my hips will be minimal.

For now I continue PT; however, he wants it focused, and with one therapist only. If that means cutting back some to do that, then so be it.

He asked me what other issues bothered me. I told him I had not been eating well over the last month. He wanted to know if I needed a nutritionist. I told him I would pass on that, and work on it myself. I have done it before, and I can do it again.

So all in all it is a positive week on the medical front. The doctor wants to see me in December to see how I am progressing, and then once I hit double digit miles, he wants me to undergo some additional tests.

So now I look for a 2009 marathon. Off the top of my head, I am not inclined to run Chicago. While I have unfinished business with that race, I am not sure I want to go through with it for now. We will see. Plenty of time to consider.

Charlie

Valuing Life

It is a very cliched thing, but none the less true, that when you are faced with a possible diagnosis of Cancer, or any other life threatening ailment, you really think about life, and what you value about it. The last few weeks have given my an opportunity to really look at life, and see how much I value it.

The doctor's visit went like this..... I got to his office at 9:17 - early, but there. I signed in, and within two minutes, I was asked to go into the examination room. As he had previously, Mark was there for moral support, and a tissue if needed. I really appreciate Mark being with me. Considering all the medical issues he has faced this year, I was really glad he came along. I felt like I had helped him a great deal, and now the favor was being returned.

The doctor poked his head in, and said "I have one person ahead of you, but I wanted to let you know you that you are 100% free of Cancer. I didn't want you to stew about it. I'll be right back." Mark got up, gave me a hug, and I cried. Once the emotional part was over, the doctor came back in, and talked to me about it. He reviewed everything with me. I have calcification on the prostate. I asked what needed to be done about it. The doctor, told me if it isn't Cancer, he is not concerned. That was what he felt during the rectal exam.

So then I let it all sink in - I don't have Prostate Cancer!

I smiled so much, and told the doctor I had been writing about his on my blog, so if he reads this, he comes off as a hero in this story.

I do have to go back in a year for an annual check up. I am happy to do that. The visit was over at 9:38 a.m..

The rest of the day I did various things. I headed to the Zoo. I got to feed the cows at the Farm at the Zoo! I also headed to Barnes and Noble and bought a book. In short, I took it easy, and gave some quiet thanks to God that I don't have to face Cancer.

This is the third time I have to seriously look at life, and be reminded how much living I have to do, and how much I cherish my life. A false HIV diagnosis, a failed suicide attempt and now dodging Prostate Cancer. One day the real deal will happen. Until then I continue with my plan to live life to the fullest.

Tomorrow I see my regular doctor. We are going to review everything, and if all goes well I will have a green light to train for a marathon next year. I can tell you if I am allowed, it is going to be my best marathon - ever!

My family and friends are an amazing support. I am also so appreciative the support all of you readers have shown. You have no idea how much it means to me. Thank you.

Peace,
Charlie

Clearing the Mind

I'm about to head to the doctor's for my results. I got up early this morning for a short 2 mile run. This was a clearing my head run. I headed to the lake at Loyola Park, and ran out to the lighthouse, I paused a few moments to look at the Chicago skyline. For those who have not visited my city, Chicago has a stunning skyline. When you see it along the Lake Michigan shoreline, you are in awe.

So what did I think about on this run? To be honest...next to nothing. I had the iPod on, and listened to Matthew Ebel. Steve Runner introduced his music to me a few weeks ago on his podcast, and I listened over and over again to "I Know You're There." It was the perfect song for this morning. The thoughts I did have were that I hope all goes well at the doctor, and I get to come home and share good news with all of you.

Again thanks for the many people who have wished me well. Steve talked about my issues on his latest podcast. I was very moved.

So now I am finishing my cup of coffee...and off I go to the doctor's. Talk to you all later.

Charlie

Another Day...Another Day at PT

Today I had the therapist, who is hell bent on getting me to try running in the water. She seems to think that I would hate the idea. I have heard of the exercise, and would be open to trying it. It would just seem strange doing it at first. The idea is my legs and hips would become stronger in the water, and make my running easier.

Otherwise it was good therapy day. This PT is a big believer in Pilates, so I was using the apparatus today. It's tough, but this kind of therapy I like much better than what I have been doing.

Tuesday I have my appointment with my regular doctor. He will have my biopsy results, and my PT report. At that point we will see how I proceed running wise. I hope for two things: 1) No cancer!!! 2) I can run a marathon next year.

Charlie

Progress or Failure?

Today was physical therapy. I usually not upbeat after PT. I always feel it shows me what I'm not able to do, and not what I can do. The therapist tells me I am making progress. Still it feels like failure to me.

I think part of the problem is the therapist is always busy with 3-4 people at a time, so I am not sure she is willing watching closely. Maybe she is. I don't know.

I told her today I get discouraged. She told me she thinks I am getting to a point where I can cut back on PT. Ok...I suppose that means progress.

Oy!

Charlie

Tonight's Run

Tonight's run was an actual run. I went from the gym to the lake, and ran along Lake Michigan. I had no real stamina, but I was determined to do this run. I ended up going 4.6 miles. It was the longest run I have been on in months.

I listened to Vivaldi's Four Seasons, which was nice. My running was not great. I felt stiff, and was not in a good groove. I can cut myself a break....I've not had a good week. Still, I have decided nothing over a 5K race this year. There was an 8K I wanted to do, but I have some work to do.

Still feeling down. Work was rough today, which did not help. I think the economy has finally caught up with the running shoe business.

Charlie

The Biopsy

I thought long and hard before writing this post. Some of this may make you uncomfortable, but I believe in being open with this blog, so I am going to talk about yesterday's biopsy. If you feel you may not want to read more of this post, I understand.

It was a downpour of rain, and I worried that was an omen. I got to the doctor's office a bit wet, but ready for the procedure. Mark went with me. I didn't want to go alone, and he and I have had our share of doctor visits dealing with his issues this year. I was glad to have him there. He would have to wait in the waiting room though.

The doctor explained what would happen. My posterior would be numbed, and I would feel to needle pricks in the anus. Then the biopsy. To keep my distracted, the doctor talked about the economic issues we have going on in the U.S.. An odd topic, but it was fine. Approximately a probe was entered, and it felt like an air gun was going off inside. At no time did I feel pain, but it sure was NOT comfortable. I grimaced, and felt sad during the whole procedure.

It didn't last long at all. The doctor told me he discovered some calcifcation(sp) in the prostate, but did not really explain what that meant. He told me he would see me next week for the test results.

Afterwards, I helped Mark run some errands. I called my sister to let her know I was ok. Then headed home. At home, I ordered a pizza, and sat in bed playing a video game. I was not in the mood for company, nor did I want to talk to anyone.

Of course I hope for the best, but I really felt like crap yesterday, and I have to admit, I am not a whole lot better today. I won't feel any relief until Monday I suppose.

No matter how it turns out, I can't tell you how important it is for men to make sure they have a healthy prostate. I know what I describe is not easy or comfortable, but a few minutes of an uncomfortable rectal exam could save your life. Please don't let the ICK factor keep you from having the exam.

Charlie

Meditative Run

Yesterday I went for a 3.2 mile run around Loyola Park. The park is a nice stretch right along Lake Michigan. At one point you run out on a pier, and you get a stunning view of Chicago's skyline. I took no music. I was just alone chanting my usual running chant - "World Peace."

I always find when I use that chant I am relaxed and my breathing calms down. I feel very centered. I really wanted to be alone with my thoughts, as I was preparing for today.

I haven't talked much with my friends. I have actually wanted to be more internal as I get ready for my biopsy this afternoon. I know some folks will feel bad I have not been more communicative, but this test has rattled me, and I really want to be alone with my thoughts.

The run was easy, and the weather was great. I bit grey like fall usually is; a great breeze, and the city looking great. I love fall!

Again....thanks to those who have written me and wished me well. I truly appreciate it. I will let you all know how it goes.

Peace,
Charlie

A Good Day at PT

Today's physical therapy was pretty good. The therapist did some tests on my progress, and she seems to think I am doing well. I'm not great, but I am not where I was at the start, so that is promising to me. I have a follow up with my doctor in a couple weeks, so I will see what he has to say on this.

Of course the overriding issue in my head is Monday's biopsy. Thanks to those who have written me, as several folks have. I deeply appreciate it more than you know. I am hesitant to talk more about it as I am still coping in my head. I am very lucky to have family and friends who are being supportive, especially my family.

Back to today....I need to work on my leg strength and balance. That seemed to be the major concern today. Sometimes I wonder if this is all puzzle I am not getting totally. Last week one therapist talked about my back, this week another talks about my legs. It gets confusing.

Still I will take a day of progress.

Charlie

Thoughts In Bed

Monday I will have the biopsy on my prostate. As I think I have now shared, I am scared and nervous. It's funny when I talk about this with people, I get the "Everything will be fine" talk. I appreciate the fact these people don't want me to worry, but I do.

I worry about what happens if I have Cancer. No doubt I will do all I can to fight it. But I worry what this does in relation to my work, to my running, to my friendships. to everything. Yeah...I'm a worrier.

I watched my mom die from Cancer, and it was hard to watch. This was such a strong woman, and I watched her deteriorate. I don't want that.

There have been times over the last couple of weeks I have wanted to cry, and just be a mess. But there is always someone telling me all will be fine. I don't want to sound like I don't appreciate it, but I am someone who needs to be allowed to feel what they feel.

Yes....I know this could not be Cancer, and I pray that it is something else...or just nothing. But for now I need to express my fear.

Charlie

Marathon Kids Chicago

November 8 is an important day for Chicago school children. Marathon Kids Chicago will be kicking off that day. I have talked about Marathon Kids before.

"Marathon Kids® is a free, twelve-year-old, trademarked, incremental, school and community based fitness program. It is a six month endurance-building running/walking, nutrition and schoolyard gardening project for K-5th graders and their families."

Kay Morris is a force of nature who has really gotten school systems around the country to get kids moving. I have had the pleasure of working with Kay on making Marathon Kids Chicago a reality. She has a passion for her mission of getting children fit.

Childhood obesity is a major problem in our country, and terrific efforts like Marathon Kids is making a difference in so many lives.

I encourage all of you to support this program by either volunteering if you are in a Marathon Kids city, or by donating a little money to make sure we are doing all we can to keep our children fit and healthy.

http://www.marathonkids.org/

Charlie

2008 AIDS Run 5K

I don't know who would ever check, but in the history of my running career, this race will not go down as a major time achievement 36:56. However it will go down as a solid run for an excellent cause.

It was a very warm morning along Chicago's lakefront. I am not a fan of the course. The first 1.4 mile is on a sidewalk, which is full of inexperienced runners and potholes. Once you get on the lakefront path, it is a decent course.

I was not really prepared for this run, with all I have been going through, but I felt strong enough to do this. My first two miles were 11:31 and 12:01. I walked a bit more on the last mile, which slowed me down. While I am used to running for time, I was not looking to set the world on fire.

Whenever I run the AIDS Run, I do so in memory of my late friend David Wagle. David and I went through middle and high school together. He passed away in 1994 of AIDS related causes. I raised $260 which will go to AIDS services in the Chicago area.

Thanks to those who donated to my run. I appreciate it. You can still donate if you like.

https://afc.aidschicago.org/NETCOMMUNITY/SSLPage.aspx?pid=587&srcid=657&frsid=5150

Charlie

A Good Week

This week I have had a good 2 mile run, a good workout on the eliptical, and a really good therapy session.

I worked with a new therapist(new for me), and she was pretty blunt. My legs can only be worked so much. She believes I need some strong core work. This means more pilates. I'm fine with that. She told me she was going to be tough. I'm fine with that too. Sometimes we need a kick in the ass!!!

My 2 mile run was easy, which is fine. No need for record setting.

Tomorrow is the AIDS Run. I'm going for a PR. I am soley running for running, and to raise money for AIDS services in Chicago. I'm really looking forward to the run.

Charlie

Bit by Bit

Today I went out for a run....my first in a while. I walked a mile to the Loyola Track, then I ran a mile. I did a run walk combination. Still trying to make sure my IT Band is feeling ok. It was fine. I was horribly out of shape, but it felt good to run again.

My return to running is slow going, but I expect it to be. I hav a 5K this Saturday. There will be no blazing run. I will be running the AIDS Run, so this will be for charity and fun.

For those who would like to donate....I am still short of my goal at last check.

https://afc.aidschicago.org/NETCOMMUNITY/SSLPage.aspx?pid=587&srcid=657&frsid=5150

So the running goes....slowly, but it goes.

Charlie

Rethinking 50

Not sure if I have shared this, but I had a goal in mind for when I turn 50 - to run the Comrades Marathon.

http://www.comrades.com/

Comrades is a 54 mile race, which in some years is down the mountains, and other years is up the mountains. You have 12 hours to finish the race, or there is no record of you being in the race. It is one of the world's toughest races.

My journey to Costa Rica made me reassess that. I told this to one of my team mates in Costa Rica, and they thought it was sad. I didn't. We can only do what our bodies are capable of doing. Granted the route for Comrades would be nothing like the muddy terrain of Tarrazu, but they would be very difficult for my legs and feet. So in the end, I think I need another challenge.

I still want to push myself, but not to the point that it would be impossible to achieve. I think Comrades with my limited range of motion would be a bit too difficult. If anyone thinks otherwise, let me know.

So what I need is a new goal. Maybe I do a flatter ultramarathon. Maybe I try another activity. I know I want to do something which will be outside the box. Suggestions are welcome. I have a little over 4 years!

Charlie

Watching the Rain

It is a downpour in Chicago this morning. Those poor folks doing their long runs today...yikes!

My plan is to get back to running. I am feeling pretty good. I think I am about 85-90% back on the IT Band issue, so I want to start running. Besides I have the AIDS run 5K next week. Gotta run.

I am also going to hit the gym as far as weight training. I think this is the key for me now.

I was in decent shape in Costa Rica....but I think it proved I could be in better shape.

No decisions on future racing until I get my biopsy. I don't like things holding me up. I like to plan, but this isn't something to plan around if I do have Cancer. We'll see.

Charlie

Moving Ahead

Yesterday I needed to do something good after my visit to the doctor the other day. So I had a massage. Instead of "working" on anything, I told the therapist I needed to not think for an hour....the massage was great! It helped and I was in a better mood.

Today was physical therapy day. The good news my IT Band did not hurt at Beth worked on it! Woo Hoo. She told she thought I was making great progress. So this made me feel good, after feeling kind of crappy over the last couple of days.

I am hoping to go for a run when my schedule really enables me to. It has been a rough week.

Charlie

The Best of Times....The Interesting of Times

Hello All!

There is a lot to cover in this post, so I will get right to it.

First of all I am back from my most amazing adventutre in Costa Rica! Just a reminder, I won a trip from Starbucks to work with Earthwatch in the Tarrazu Region of Costa Rica with coffee farmers. I worked with 9 other incredible people from around the country, and Sebastian and Natalia who live in the Tarrazu Region and work for Earthwatch.

My day involved getting up at 5a.m., eathing a HEARTY breakfast which almost always involved rice and beans, and then we headed out into the coffee fields. We took soil samples, measured distances from coffee plants to shade trees, counted the number of coffee cherries on the plants and investigated ground cover. All of this is to be analyzed, and will go a long way towards helping the farmers of the region with sustainable crop development.

As you can see from the pictures above, it was some challenging terrain. We were at altitudes of 5000-7000 ft, and it was MUDDY! It being the rainy season, did not make the footing any better. I worked my butt off, and pushed myself physically. I dare say, this was as difficult as my first marathon. I found I would get emotional over what I was accomplishing there.

The people were wonderful to us. The farmers were so welcoming, and happy to share their farms with our team. They understood the importance of what we are doing, and responded by answering all of our questions, welcoming us into their homes, and treating us like we had been life long friends. If only I knew Spanish.....

I learned more about coffee than a person has a right to know. More importantly I came to understand the importance of fair trade. For those who don't know, fair trade is making sure that farmers or other workers are paid a fair price for their work and products.

Starbucks typically pays above the market price for coffee. They have a certification standard similar to the Fair Trade certification, and farmers want this certification, because it not only assures a fair price for their coffee, but it also means more money is being used for social and educational programs in the community. As an example, most of the farmers in Tarrazu have not kept records of their farms. One educational program has taught farmers to keep track of fertilizing their crops, what their annual production is and how to budget their money.

On my journey, I met Ingrid, Harmony, Debbie, Jason, Chris. Alexandra, Jewis, Christine and Kimball. These were fellow winners of the contest, and came from all over the U.S.. Together we traversed the mountains, crossed the rivers and counted the berries. I have never been a part of a team that worked so well, especially in such a short amount of time. They were a great group.

No running while I was in Costa Rica, but I certianly can chalk up the two weeks to cross training. OY!

So now I am back....and this leads me to my other news. Yesterday I had an appointment with the Urologist. During my physical my doctor told me my PSA was high for a man my age, and I needed a prostate exam. Yesterday's appointment was that exam. The Urologist was a very nice man, and explained everything to me, especially what the PSA numbers mean. Normally a man my age would have numbers below 2.0. I was registering a 2.5. He examined my prostate, and came to the conclusion that I need a biopsy. He told me that for now there is nothing to worry about. He obviously doesn't know me very well. :-)

I am scared. I have my biopsy in a few weeks, and will know the results a week later. I have to be positive that things will be ok, but as I said, I am scared. All I know is that I don't want to have Cancer.

In the meantime, I am continuing with my physical therapy, and I am going to hit the road and run today for the first time in a few weeks I am running the AIDS Run 5K on the 20th, so I want to be ready.

So as the title indicates, it is the best of times, and it is also the interesting of times.

Charlie

Good Progress

Tonight I ran another 3 miles. Very happy to report there was no pain. I am making sure that I am not going to fast or hard. I am also trying to adjust my gait/stride. I think I am making progress there. I will learn more about that at physical therapy later this week.

I have been running at the gym all summer. My reasons now have more to do with making sure I am on a softer surface, which the treadmill is. It's also making sure I am monitoring my pace.

Again I have to credit my taking Glucosamine with some of my progress. I don't feel as achy in my joints, and I can tell you THAT is a good thing.

Charlie