The Year That Wasn't and the Year That Will Be

Anyone who reads this blog will know about the struggles I had this year. It really wasn't a year of running for me. I think it was the year of just plodding along. I'm sorry you all had to read about plodding, when you came here to read about running.

It was a year of stress, upheaval, and change. Some for the good, some not for the good. So I say we kick out 2010 and embrace 2011. The year that wasn't is making way for the year that will be.

We know I have the fall scheduled. Now I need a training plan and some spring and summer goals. Of course the main goal is FAR more important.

I need to be healthier and fitter in 2011. It is vital to me. I need to tackle the mental as well as the physical well being. I know I have had a lot of emotional issues, but I have lacked structure in my life. So I have started writing down dedicated this month for running or working out. I think this will help.

I am also determined to be a better blogger. I want people to enjoy the blog, and not worry if I ran or not. So I pledge to be a bit more interesting. Hang with me....I promise to be my old self again.

Charlie

Sad Day

Today is a hard day for me. I have written on this before, but now the elephant is being addressed. I have gained a significant amount of weight. As for this morning I am at 240lbs.

I cried. Poor Mark had to console me. I feel like a failure at the moment. I feel like so much I worked for is gone.

There are so many reasons why this has happened. Number one though is, that as an emotional eater, I have not found a healthy way to deal with emotional issues in my life. I need to do that. Step one is to make a plan, and stick with it.

I now know my January schedule, so I am going to schedule workout/run time. When the doctor told me he wanted me to run only 3 days a week, I feel that was the beginning of this. I am going to work on bumping the running back up to 5 days a week. My hips feel fine, and I think it is worse for them if I don't run.

As for the emotional issues I am dealing with in my personal life. I am going to make a concentrated effort to work on those. I may be sharing some of what is going on here. I feel this will keep me more honest.

For those of you who read this and have been inspired by my story, I feel I have let you down. I know I have let myself down. Please keep the faith that I will get a grip on this and turn things around. It does me no good to go back to being 300+ lbs.

Today I am discouraged. I know I will be fine....but for today, I feel like failure.

Charlie

Merry Christmas

I wish everyone a Merry Christmas!

Charlie

The Great Equalizer

Yesterday I ran on the track of the gym. It was actually a very busy track day. Lots of people were running, and I observed a several things. First of all the track is oval. Granted that is not a startling revelation. I already knew that. Work with me for a few minutes though.

That oval puts runners on a level playing field. There was the guy with gazelle like abilities speeding around. There were the two women I passed a couple of times who were doing a run on their lunch hour. There was the young man training for his boot camp. How do I know that? He was running in boots with a back pack - fully loaded - on his back. There was also the older man who was just running hard, as I imagine he always runs.

It doesn't matter how fast or slow you go on the track. Everyone starts and finishes at the same place. No one is competing, but we all have a common goal. Starting, running and finishing is what we are all doing, and it doesn't matter how - we all do it.

That oval makes us all equal. The only time we are separated is in competition.

Last night was another First Steps session, and the one woman who was walking told me she almost didn't come, because she doesn't like being last. I told her it isn't about the placement. It's about the journey. She understood, but I could tell she didn't want to be last. I did put a positive spin on things - I told her we would be first back to the store. She laughed.

The oval of the track reinforces the notion that running is about the journey and not the final destination. Destination is why there are races.

Charlie

Quite an Anniversary

Today is a special day for me. It was 4 years ago I started my career in running specialty. Over the last 4 years I have had some wonderful experiences. I have met some wonderful people. I have also learned so much about running.

One of my favorite things I have gotten to do is to share my love of running with people. In Chicago I had the honor of training couch to 5K programs. I have been amazed at the stories people bring to running, and how I can help them achieve their goals.

Today I added another chapter to my story. I am coaching a program called "First Steps." This is a program for people who have not been active, as they take their first steps to be healthier lifetime. I met some wonderful person.

One woman really stuck with me. She and her husband are doing the program together. She is coming back from a brain aneurysm. She had been in a wheelchair, re-learned to walk, now wants to run. WOW! I am in awe.

I have met people from the woman I described to superstar Ryan Hall. I am so blessed to be in this business. Happy Anniversary.

Charlie

First Steps - Coming Soon

Saturday I will be co-coaching a beginning walking/running program called "First Steps." This is a 5 week starter program designed to get people off the couch and moving. This is not a couch to 5K program, which I have coached in the past. This one is for the person who needs to begin a journey to be fitter. I am honored to be asked to coach this.

I am going through my own journey these days, so I am hoping that this will give me a personal kick start. Even if it doesn't though, I am thrilled to help people. Just part of the reason I love working in running specialty.

Charlie

Hit That Treadmill

Today we were at the gym, and I ran a good solid 3 miles on the treadmill. I have had a hard work schedule this week, so I was really glad to hit the gym. For the first mile, I ran at a 5.0-5.1 pace, breaking at the 6 minute mark for a walk break. The second mile was 5.0-5.2, but I was using an incline up to 1.5%.

I like mixing things up with an incline, because the world is not a flat 0% incline. As you all know it is so hard to find a race that is completely flat, so a bit of incline training helps.

On my mind today - I was very focused on finishing the 3 miles in under 36 minutes. It didn't happen, but I was fine with how I ran, and my time was 36:10. Can't really complain. My mantra during the run was "Just do this." Sorry Nike, I paraphrased. I find it helps to have a common thought or mantra in my head as I run. As a result, I think I had a really good run today.

Charlie

40

A few years ago, frequent readers will remember how happy I was when I became a size 38. Those readers, and the rest of you will now see how unhappy at being a size 40. I had to do it. I didn't like doing it, and I am trying not to be depressed about it. Today though, I had to buy some size 40 jeans.

I am trying to be realistic about this. I am looking at this as temporary, not that that I will be a 42, but I will again be a 38. Still it was hard trying on the larger size. I saw it as a temporary setback and not a defeat.

I have talked about my recent weight gain, and I will talk about my eventual weight loss, because that is how I see it - eventual. I have some running goals, and I need to be in shape for them. I promise you I am determined to do it.

Charlie

Fall Marathon Decision

Today I made a bold choice while considering my fall marathon for 2011. I am in the lottery for the NYC Marathon, but I doubt I will get in. I want Plan B ready to go, and I wanted to pick I had wanted to do for a while. One was getting close to closing, so I jumped on it.

If I don't get into NYC, then I will be running the Portland Marathon. I am actually VERY excited about this. I love Portland, and this is a great chance to really see the city. October will be a great time to be in Oregon.

If by some freaky reason I do get into NYC, I will most likely sell my bib number for Portland.

So now I have a goal.....now I still need a 1/2 marathon for the Spring.

Charlie

Shadow and Straight Ahead

Today my goal was 3 miles on the track at the gym. So while it was FREEZING outside, I was at the gym on the track. I was very proud that I got that 3 miles in.

So how did it go? It went well. I was zipping around the track. I did a couple of things, and I learned something interesting. I noticed I was looking down quite a bit and was watching my shadow on the track. From what I saw, I had a plodding gait. So how did I correct this?

I looked straight ahead. I started picking spots on the walls, and fixed my eyes on them. I soon noticed my gait was elongated and I actually moved faster. I was surprised by this. I felt easier as I ran, and the run felt darned good.

I will see if this continues on future runs.

As for other issues....I need a half marathon for the Spring - any ideas?

Charlie

Determined

Yesterday I was determined to run 4 miles - and I did it! The gym was a must, and I went for two miles on the track. Then I hit the treadmill for another 2 miles. My music of choice started with Christmas songs. What can I say I am THE Christmas Queen! :-)

Finding a time to really run is problematic with my schedule, but when I have time, I am determined to do the miles. Yesterday was important to me. The next run will be important to me. Running helps me be sane in a world of chaos. It centers me. I miss the regularity of running.

I need to find that time. I need to be as determined in finding the time as I am in my accomplishing my miles.

Charlie

Christmas and Running

I want to talk to you for a moment about giving during the Christmas season. As runners, a good many of us have run for charity. Some of us do Team in Training. Other run to fight AIDS. We serve a noble purpose when we run for a good cause.

This season, I am asking you all to give back to running. Running gives us so much, and I believe it is important to give back so running can grow. This year I have given to two different running groups.

I have supported Marathon Kids for a long time. I have talked about this organization for a long time. Kay Morris is a force of nature, and you can't help but be taken in by her passion to get kids running and healthy. www.marathonkids.org.

For the last two years I have sent a donation to the Loyola University Chicago Cross Country team. I am a Loyola graduate and I love running, so this seems like a natural. I believe we need to encourage our next generation of runners. At a time of tightening the money belts, college programs need help. Look into a local college, or your alma mater, or even a high school program to see who needs help.

This is such a wonderful time of year, please take some time to share.

Charlie

Chilly Run....but...

It was important to me that I run today. I wanted to just get out and go. For 35+ minutes I ran in my area. I even ventured into a subdivision, just to see what it looked like. Nice run. It was chilly though. Temps were in the upper 30s this morning. It was sunny though, and it felt good to get out.

I thought a lot about what I wrote yesterday. I have been in a self pity mode, and I need to get out of that. I know it's crappy for me, but it must be worse to read about it. Yikes! I am forming a running plan in my head for this week, and we will see how that goes.

Still it felt so good to be out there. It was a slow run. Lots of rolling road to run on. I think this slows my time quite a bit. Very different from flat Chicago. My time was 35:38. Not fast my any means. I did enjoy being out there, and I think that is what made the difference.

Charlie

Tiger Woods and Me

Yesterday I ran a total of 5K on the treadmill at the gym, and off in the distance I watched the TV which was focusing on Tiger Woods. As I watched, I thought Tiger and I have had a similar year. No no no ..... I don't mean I am recovering from a scandal of cheating with a dozen skanky ho's. I'm talking about our careers - his is golf, mine is running.

Tiger's professional year was horrible - no wins, missed cuts, and a lackluster Ryder Cup. I found myself out of shape, ran a lackluster half marathon, and felt like I needed to regroup, but was not sure how. So now both of us need to put 2010 behind us, and look to the future. It's clear I need not only goals, but I need a plan to achieve those goals. I think I know the goals I want to achieve, which I will talk about soon. How to put the plan together is another story. I know I can't have another 2011 running wise, like I had in 2010.

I know I want to do one marathon, and at least 2 half marathons. Which ones are up for grabs with Boston out of the picture. Thoughts anyone? I could use some advice.

Charlie

No Running of Late

Sorry for the lack of writing. I have not run this week. A combination of things - my work schedule, some pain in my legs and feet, mostly from the long hours at work and I have a bit of lethargy. Most it has been the first two reasons.

My legs and feet are sore from the 8-10 hours of standing I have been doing, for 10 days in a row. I think it has caught up with me. Ugh!

The lethargy is an emotional issue. I really felt let down after the news about Boston. So now I have to try to get some inner energy to get back to running.

Charlie

Meeting Meb

Today I had the privilege to meet distance runner Meb Keflezighi. Meb won the 2009 NYC Marathon and the Silver Medal in the Marathon at the 2004 Athens Olympics. He was at our store for a book signing of his memoir. Approximately 100 people showed up at our store to meet Meb. He was only supposed to be in our store from 3- 4:30. He stayed until way past 5 to make sure everyone in line had a chance to talk with him.

I am always in awe of the successful runners who meet the public. There is little to no attitude. They are genuinely happy to meet their fans and supporters. Meb was as kind as could be. He was a little late getting to the store, but when he did, he apologized to the crowd, and very quickly went into the line and shook everyone's hand who had been waiting. Class.

I was "bouncer." I was the end of the line, and had to tell anyone who came in after 4:30, that the line was closed. Thankfully, I didn't have to bounce anyone. Of course being at the end, meant I got to have the last moment with Meb.

He was very nice. I told him I was sorry he didn't defend NYC this year. He told me very quietly and nicely, "I run over 70 miles a week. Some days I have good runs, some days I have not so good runs. In the end it's all good." What a great attitude to have.

Now I need to read his book.

Charlie

Dream Deferred

Last night I came to a painful decision, but one I feel I had to make. I am going to decline Charity Teams generous offer to put me on another charity team for Boston, and go with their initial decision to put me on the top of the wait list for MDSC.

As I have made more than clear, running Boston is the ultimate marathon for me, as it is for so many other runners. The charity I run for has to resonate deeply for me. While I have a connection with the Dick Beardsley Foundation, it does not have the impact for me that a charity for Down Syndrome has. I want to be sure that my niece Sabrina, and so many just like her have as bright a future as possible.

I may in fact still run Boston, and I am going to train like I am, but for now the dream is deferred. Is it bad I want someone to drop out of the team so I can have that spot?

Charlie

The Questions of the Day

Last night I found out I was turned down to run for MDSC for the Boston Marathon, but I have the chance to run on one of a couple teams. One organization I am familiar with, but would need to raise $5,000. The other, I am learning about, and the fundraising is $3000.

I am also feeling intimidated about the course.

So here are the questions of the day:

Can I successful complete the Boston Marathon?

Which organization should I represent?

Should I do Boston?

Trust me, Boston is a dream of mine, but now I am feeling a bit overwhelmed. Thoughts?

Charlie

Quiet Run

Today I just wanted a quiet run - no music, no traffic, just running. I headed to the cemetery and found most of that. Ironically there were quite a few visitors in visiting today. I'm sure they found it odd that a 40something guy was running by. I kind of smiled as I thought of it.

Still it was a quiet run. The weather was nice - 50 degrees and partly cloudy.

The goal of this run was to run and clear my head. When thoughts came in, I just pushed them out. I did not want to think about anything. I did 2.8 miles, and felt good. I did an easy pace, and was pleased with how I felt.

I think there are days we need quiet runs. Eventually I am going to find a place which really takes me away from it all, so I can be totally at peace during the run. The peacefulness is healing if you are going through stress at home or work. It also gives you time for reflection if that is what you want. I suggest a run where you clear your mind. I think it can do some good.

Charlie

Run Back in Time

Yesterda morning Mark and I were in Bloomington, IN - home of Indiana University, and my home in the mid to late 80s. We were in Bloomington to celebrate my birthday. Being in Bloomington was a step back in time, and I wanted to go on a run which meant something to me. Mark and I headed towards campus.

Running towards the campus center, we passed IU's Gay Lesbian Bisexual Transgernder Student Support Services Office - http://www.indiana.edu/~glbt/ In 1988 I was elected president of OUT, a fledgling LGBT student group. My election always surprised me, because I had only attended 3 meetings, and now I was in charge. YIKES! My election kicked me into the world of activism. In addition to to being OUT president, I would chair the committee which brought the NAMES Project AIDS Memorial Quilt to Indiana for the first time, and I briefly served in student government as head of LGBT concerns.

From 1988 - 1990, my goal was to make sure gays and lesbians were a part of the university's community. We successfully got sexual orientation into the schools code of student ethics and anti-discriminatory policies. We created pride week. We created Miss GAY IU, a fun drag contest/fundraiser. We fought the military's anti-gay policies. We also wanted an office where gays and lesbians could go to for resources, support, meeting spaces, etc.

A day earlier, Mark and I toured the office, and it was emotional for me as I saw one of our goals turned into a reality. One of the director's of the center was so nice and talked with me. She made a point of telling me, "Without you, this would not be a reality." That is very nice of her to say, but it was the work of efforts of me, and the people who succeeded me, who made that center a reality. Running by the office gave me a sense of pride, and some emotion.

We continued on our run and did a lap around the fountain which is in front of the Fine Arts School, the IU Auditorium and the Lilly Library. My best memory of that area is when the campus went nuts over the 1987 IU National Basketball Championship.

From there we headed along the road behind the union. Those who have seen the film "Brealing Away" will recognize it as the seen where Dave is chasing down the girl of his dreams on his bike, and she is on a scooter, all so he can return a dropped notebook to her.

Finally we headed down Kirkwood Ave, a main food/bar area in town. Bars such as Nick's and Kilroy's are legendary to IU grads. It also a cultural center for the town of Bloomington.

All in all we ran 2 miles, but with all the memories, it seemed like a long run back in time.

Charlie